NOT AN EASY ROAD

Love,

but my hand will always be open for you. My doors always unlocked, and the pathway to my heart perfectly clear. When we were 10 years old I gave you a piece of my heart that I never took back. I never told you that you had it, I think you've always known. We grew older and I found a love in other places, I love that I can't call love anymore. I could take that feeling only so far and it felt like there should be more but I couldn't get more. It took 4 years to realize that I couldn't give her more because there was a piece of me missing...the piece I gave to you. You were more.

I've spent the past 2 months tearing myself apart over this, analyzing every situation, every moment. I realized that I started to pull you back into my life. I pretended to want to study with you, and prayed for anatomy tests so I could have you over. I denied it even though I knew what I was doing. ÊShe started to notice what I noticed too, that I was leaving her without actually leaving. Things started to unravel as I knew they would and my emotions took over. I went to her every morning but my eyes were looking for you. ÊI kissed her everyday but my lips wanted yours. People started to talk and I didn't care. I didn't answer the questions. All I wanted was you.

Everyday you seemed more beautiful. I touched you. ÊI couldn't read you though I tried. I talked to her, I told her I had nothing more to give, and I never would. She loved me and with tears in her eyes she let me go. I love her for that. I had everything to give to you and I wanted you to have it. For the first time in so long I was searching again, but it was not a blind search. I knew what I wanted and I saw it everyday in you. Ê

You started to respond, you started to look for me. I wanted to let you feel what I felt, I called you over, you fell asleep in my arms and I knew you felt it. You hugged me with tears in your eyes when I told you we broke up. I cried. We cried tears of joy together. I wanted to kiss you, I looked at you to see what you were telling me. Your hands found my head and mine yours, we kissed. You gave me that piece and I broke through the wall that had shut me out for so long. I felt an amazing sense of relief, you held onto my heart for all those years, and you were sharing it with me again.

We gave each other everything in that kiss. You felt it, I know you did. Where this love takes us now is not an easy road, but a road we can travel together. People will talk, friendships will be lost, but every moment we spend together will make it ok .I want to kiss you, I want to sleep with you, I want to talk about everything with you. I love you. I'm not scared to write that, because I know you feel that way about me. Ê

We were 10 years old when you knew you loved me, and here I am begging for a second chance. I feel it too, I've always felt it, I just could never find it. If nothing else, keep this letter with you. Always remember you can come back on this, and while you may feel like you need to search elsewhere, your heart is with me. I love you.




the love letter collection