YOUR PASSWORD IS "PASSWORD" FOR GOD'S SAKE


Dear _____,

I suppose you might know already but I have read her e-mails to you.. I hope you aren't mad at me, I mean, what do you expect.. I AM the jealous girlfriend and your password was "password" for gods sake. It started when you hadn’t emailed me for a few days and I didn't know what was going on —so I went to see if you had even gotten my email. then I saw her name. my heart was pounding so fast. I really need you to let me know, definitively, what is going on. I am ready to tear my hair out. it seems that your relationship was more, and continued a lot longer than what you are letting on. You let her fall in love with you. and you are breaking more than one heart.

I feel so far away.

i was so afraid last semester when i found out that we had to move out of the house. I felt so homeless, but i realized that i still would have you, even if you were in _________—you were my home. you were my rock i could cling to even if we were separated by two oceans. now i just feel like i am lost... i can't throw away my rock, but i don't know what to do... I feel like I'm drowning, scrambling to save this relationship and you are not helping me enough... and i am afraid of what that means.

this has shaken me to the core of my being. its like my foundation has been dismantled enough that i feel about to crumble completely.

_____, you better do something fast. you have to decide what you want and tell me how you feel. you need to decide whether you want me, or if you want to leave me for another; if you want to try and fix this relationship or start a new one, albeit one with its foundation in death and betrayal.

I wasn't going to confront you about this, because I suspected that you were emailing her to tell her not to come, and I was just going to see how it played out.. but now it is different. now I don't know what to believe.

and by the way, you can stop feeling bad for yourself about the fact that I cheated on you because I only gave in ONCE, while you were seeing her many times over a prolonged period of time, long enough that she believed she and you could possibly be together. you were having a sexual AND emotional Relationship, and that is so unfair. I have been good to you, _____, and I don’t deserve this.

I hope you know what to do.
I’m sorry this is so negative but I had to get it all out in one go.

I love you always,
_______